Showing posts with label reviews. Show all posts
Showing posts with label reviews. Show all posts

2.29.2016

Better Than Before: A review of Gretchen Rubin's book on habits

Hobo Mama wants you to know she's a professional blogger! Look at how professional she's being!

Author Gretchen Rubin came to Seattle, and I didn't see her — but I saw her poster in the library often enough beforehand that I was inspired to check out her book Better Than Before: Mastering the Habits of Our Everyday Lives. It's about her own quest to understand habit formation and tips for us on how best to start and maintain good habits.

I enjoyed the book and found it very useful. Rubin outlines four personality tendencies when it comes to habits: Upholders (who find it easy to keep habits no matter what), Obligers (who will keep habits if it pleases the people they care about and they have accountability from them), Questioners (who must justify and research before they'll commit to a habit), and Rebels (who will keep habits only if it suits their antiestablishment tendencies). You probably already know from that brief description which one is you, but if not, there's a quiz on her site.

Rubin uses her own experiences coaching herself and victims … er … loved ones through habit formation to report on how each personality type can find success in keeping the habits we want, whether that's cutting our sugar intake, reading more books, taking a regular yoga class, biking with our kids each week, or whatever motivates you. She helps you clarify your goals (and figure out if you even actually want that habit — some of us will profess a habit we think we should have but have no intention of actually following through on it), set up accountability (whether internal or external, the type required for Obligers), and avoid pitfalls.

11.15.2012

Giveaway: ourfeminist{play}school review of Poetry of a Hobo Mama

I'm so happy to have a giveaway at ourfeminist{play}school for TWO ebook copies of Poetry of a Hobo Mama. From the lovely review:

Poetry of a Hobo Mama: The First Three Years
Lauren’s ability to capture the reality and heart-galloping love of parenting is unique in its honesty and breadth. Through the flow of her concise language a reader is taken into bedrooms, hospitals, and the intimacy of a nursing moment; the depth that this poet is able to extract from a single stanza is not to go unnoticed.

Too often when parenting we are reminded by those who have taken the journey ahead of us to snap photos, to write it all down. […] Lauren Wayne’s poetry gives parents the gift of retracing their own steps through their own winding road of parenting by sharing what is most intimate and paradoxically the most commonly shared among us. A gem in the parenting poetry genre.

Aw! I'm so honored and touched by her words.

Read the full review and enter the giveaway by November 25 over at ourfeminist{play}school. This would make a lovely holiday gift for a parent in your life who could use some poetry!

9.17.2012

MomAgain@40 review: We are never alone — Poetry of a Hobo Mama

I'm so thankful for this review from MomAgain@40 of Poetry of a Hobo Mama:

Poetry of a Hobo Mama: The First Three Years
I am really enjoying the honest look into motherhood. […]

I love her honesty as well as her excursions with attachment- and natural parenting style.

The poetry is a raw and honest account of pregnancy, miscarriage, birth, babies and motherhood. […]

I am copying one of the poems. One of the most poignant life-altering changes that new parents have to cope with. "Mothers are never alone" But is also a reminder to me that mothers also share the same journey, and in that we are never alone!

Read the full review and the poem over at MomAgain@40.

8.16.2012

Movie review: Failure to Launch — High on animal attacks, low on romance

Failure to LaunchContinuing in my fine tradition of reviewing things no one cares about anymore, I bring you: Failure to Launch, the romantic comedy starring Matthew McConaughey and Sarah Jessica Parker, neither of whom I can stand.

Oh, dear, I meant to be more circumspect and just say something like "I have trouble connecting to those actors," but the truth came out. I'm sure they're lovely people. I just don't like watching them. There you are.

So why was I? Because Sam signed us up for a preview of Amazon Prime, and I was determined to explore the instant video options available. I really want to watch Downton Abbey, but for my purposes that day, I needed something that could run comfortably in the background.

I'm glad I didn't give Failure to Launch any more attention than it deserved.

7.22.2010

The Secret Duke, by Jo Beverley

I thought I'd throw up (blargh! just joking) a little review of The Secret Duke, by Jo Beverley, before I forget what I think!

This book is part of the Malloren world, set in the Georgian period (mid-1700s, Malloren-wise). (Here's a full booklist at JoBev.com, and you can read an excerpt at her site as well.) I'm so used to Regencies that it's quite a treat to delve into a different era from time to time, and I love Jo Beverley, and I love the Mallorens.

So! To go a completely different direction, I'll discuss what I didn't so much like about this novel in particular.

But, first, I guess I should give a little intro and tell you what I did like. That's only fair, right?

Ok, the titular secret duke is the Duke of Ithorne, or Thorn, who likes to disguise himself occasionally and switch places with his illegitimate brother as Captain Rose and go on sailing adventures. The heroine is Bella Barstowe, who has escaped, due to a small inheritance, from under her pious brother's thumb after an unfortunate escapade (partially told in the prologue) that ruins her reputation. The characters were likable, and I enjoyed finding out what happens with Thorn. There was even a continuation of the Manx cat tale.

But:

This book contains the denouement of Lady Fowler, and I was a little disappointed (illogically) that there wasn't more to Lady Fowler than previously implied. She is in fact an ill-tempered, prudish woman. I thought maybe there'd be some sort of sly twist, and she'd turn out to be a cunning heiress who just liked messing with people by sending out gossip sheets disguised as calls for societal reform. But, no, she's just as she appears to be. This isn't Jo Beverley's fault, you understand. I'm apparently hard to please. Bella goes to work with Lady Fowler, believing her to be a true hope of reforming society and helping women escape from cruel men's dominance, before she discovers that Lady Fowler is in fact in the end stages of syphilis, losing all reason, and susceptible to the planting of treasonous seeds by newcomers.

The novel seemed a little oddly paced to me. Bella hates her priggish brother, Sir Augustus, and then finds out something scandalous about him that makes her plot to ruin him, with Captain Rose's help. There is a looong setup with this foul-Augustus angle, followed by a somewhat uncomfortable ending to that particular thread. But then there was still half the novel left to finish. The novel in general felt like several different stories pushed together: Bella on her initial escapade, Bella confined to her brother's house, Bella working with Lady Fowler, Bella's adventure with Captain Rose against Sir Augustus, etc.

The story demanded a lot of leaps of credulity in terms of the believability of disguises. Bella alters her beautiful appearance when she goes to work for Lady Fowler by applying a sallow base of makeup and donning spectacles (and moles or warts, I believe?). Bella also poses as Thorn's plain-ish wife, and as a nymph at a ball. But she's a gently bred young woman, not a cosmetics expert or super-spy. Thorn plays Captain Rose, even though the real Captain Rose actually exists and has to interact with the same people Thorn does in some instances. They're only half-brothers, too, not fully identical twins or anything. I kept thinking someone (besides Bella, in one scene where she meets the true captain) would notice something amiss in Thorn's portrayal, particularly the people who work with the captain on his ship.

As I scan the Amazon reviews, I see I'm not alone in my quibbles, even among fellow Beverley diehards.

Now, even with my issues with this book, I was still captivated by the story and love Beverley's writing and characters. I guess even with a great writer, not every book can be the best book.

So there you are! If you're a Malloren completist, you'll want to read this to hear Thorn's story and meet the enchanting Bella. If you're just being introduced to Jo Beverley, I'd pick a different book for your first meeting.

6.03.2010

A Precious Jewel, by Mary Balogh, and breaking with convention

Defying the genre's expectations


The premise behind Mary Balogh's A Precious Jewel is intriguing to me as a writer.

The book is an (unaltered) rerelease from 1993 featuring two characters from The Ideal Wife — one of whom is only a minor character, a friend of the hero, and the other who is never seen onscreen as it were but only talked about in her absence. To make matters more complicated in terms of the Regency formula, the former does not fit the standard hero mold in his own right, being rather unintelligent and not as fabulously titled as most, and the woman in question is his mistress.

Mary Balogh talks about the dilemma in her introduction to the rereleased A Precious Jewel:
I was writing traditional Regencies at the time and could hardly have a working prostitute as a heroine and a beta male as a hero!

But the characters "haunted" her to the point that, against fellow authors' advice, Balogh sat down and wrote their story in two weeks. She was subsequently surprised when her editor accepted it without question or revision.

I can understand why, though. It was riveting to get through, even as I was made uncomfortable by some of the characterizations and scenarios. I just couldn't stop reading till these two interesting people's lives were resolved.

Now, Balogh does "cheat" a little by making Priscilla Wentworth, the aforementioned prostitute, a down-on-her-luck gentlewoman instead of a typical working-class prostitute. But it's true that Sir Gerald Stapleton is a beta male. He's titled, but he's not astonishingly handsome. More significantly, he's one of the only heroes I've ever read about who isn't all that bright. Usually they're all geniuses and glib with words and magnificent in bed — Gerald hasn't ever kissed a woman before he meets Priscilla.

But their relationship doesn't start with kissing. It starts with something ostensibly much more intimate — a regular encounter at a brothel where Priscilla, aka Prissy, is working. Gerald is so dissociated from his own feelings and so mistrustful of women that this is the only way for him to connect. There were elements of this that were distasteful to read, but Balogh doesn't do a bad job with it — she makes it clear that the way Gerald is treating women and Prissy in particular is not healthy after all, and of course he must change before their love can flourish.

Priscilla, on the other hand, rather besottedly falls in fantasy-love with Gerald from their first meeting, and there is a little sense of "but why?" — for me, more in terms of Why would a bright woman love a dim man? than the other (many) considerations. But Balogh makes it justifiable by showing us Priscilla's attraction to Gerald's wounded and kind heart (underneath it all), and Priscilla never forgets that she is not a suitable candidate for any love or commitment from him in return — she accepts her role in his life and embraces her fantasies for what they are. Priscilla's development becomes more pleasing toward the end, as Priscilla has to learn to be who she is at heart and find people who accept her for herself, past and all. I was a little worried that I couldn't respect Priscilla (not for the sex worker part, but for her lack of feminism about doing Gerald's bidding), but she becomes more real and nuanced to me as the book goes on, as does her development.

In fact, if Gerald is a sort of beta hero, then Prissy is a sort of beta heroine. Every time I read a gentlewoman-becomes-a-sex-worker plot, I have to wonder how believable it is. Priscilla suffers the loss of close family members and ends up seeking out her former governess at her "finishing school" — not realizing the finishing school is actually a high-class whorehouse. Priscilla decides to throw her lot in with Miss Blythe's "girls." Wouldn't most women raised as Priscilla was and given the morals of her upbringing, when presented with several possible options for making a living, choose anything but prostitution? (And, for that matter, how exactly did her ex-governess end up a madam?) I'm still not entirely convinced her choice was realistic, but I realized that if her character had been entirely strong-minded and defiant of expectations, probably she would not have wound up a sex worker at all or would have been a different kind of mistress, and the story would not have happened. So in that sense, her personality (or lack of a strong one, at least) makes a certain sense. I did appreciate how Balogh wove into Priscilla's thoughts a reconsideration of her own choice: that Prissy chose that route before she fully understood the implications, and that she wouldn't necessarily choose it again if given the chance. Indeed, she is given something of a second chance toward the end.

Here's an example that stood out to me in terms of making the earlier portions of sex-for-hire seem less sordid, by pointing out that their relationship at the start was inadequate. In this scene, Gerald is beginning to realize this as he forces her, through his own fear and distrust and immaturity, into the old positions of mistress and employer again:

But she did and said only what her training had taught her to do and say. And that smile, which had always seemed so warm to him, was not warm at all, he saw when he looked searchingly into her eyes. It was not warm, and it was not a smile. It was a shield, a cold and metallic shield behind which she hid.



And so he allowed himself to fall into the ritual she began. He bedded her, and even told her before he joined her on the bed and mounted her that he wanted it the old way. He did not love her body at all. He used it for a pleasure that did not turn out to be pleasure but only physical satiety.

And he was punished justly. She was warm and soft and yielding—and utterly passive. The way he liked his women to be. Sex without a relationship. Physical intimacy without involvement. The illusion that he was in control, that he was master.

It's portions like this that make me as a reader feel less guilty for enjoying the story, even though the hero's often not all that heroic, and even though, as a woman and a feminist, I wish Priscilla had been stronger from the start and not quite so acquiescent.

I feel like both Priscilla and Gerald mature in believable ways over the course of the book, until they become fit partners for each other — who come together not because of circumstance but through choice and genuine love. I thought the very end was extremely touching and not a little humorous.

I'm not trying to spoil the plot, but of course you probably know by now that romance novels end happily…. I'll stop there, though, and let all the details be a surprise!

Limits to doing the unexpected in your own writing


I just wanted to talk a little more about doing the unexpected with your writing. I think there are limits and caveats but also the potential for great things.

First of all, we're not all Mary Balogh with a dedicated following (hi, Mary! *waves*) and a loyal editor. If you're looking to publish your first novel, in whatever genre (including literary), it's probably best to stick to the tried-and-true. Not the boring — put your own spin on it — but when you're trying to get your foot in the door, this is not the time to reinvent the genre.

Secondly, there are limits to how far you can bend the expected even when you are Mary Balogh. If she'd written this same novel but had the characters die in the end (spoiler: They don't!), that would have defied the point of the genre, which is romantic resolution.

Thirdly, and maybe this isn't third, because I didn't really think through this in numbered progression but just as a jumble of thoughts, so maybe it's really just related to one and two, and I'm going to start a new sentence now. [Deep breath.] I think it's easier to change details within a framework than the whole framework itself. For instance, within a typical romance novel formula of guy + girl = love and marriage, you can play around with back story and location. I've seen successful Regencies set in China or the Arabian desert, or dealing with tough issues like incest, alcoholism, spousal abuse, and adultery. There's plenty of room to play within the framework, but it would be sort of silly to write a poem with only 4 lines and call it a sonnet. If you're writing a romance, it needs to be romantic. There are subgenres you can write within, if you want to write a romance between two women, or one set in a futuristic world, or one that contains elements of the supernatural. My understanding, though, is that all of these still need to be … yes … romantic.

Fourthly (?), as relates to heroes and class distinctions and subgenres as well (fifthly?): Regencies are about upper-class England. There it is. Someone in your novel should be part of that world. But I think a successful Regency could play with this by making one or more characters pretending to be part of the world, for instance. And I've certainly seen plenty where one or the other protagonist was of a lower class or not from England originally. Outside the Regency world, there's more leeway to play with class. Contemporary novels are wide open in terms of where you want to set your protagonists on the income ladder, and where in the world you want to plop them. Historicals tend to deal more with the upper class, regardless, but I've certainly read some successful novels that deal with solely middle-class or working-class characters. Western romances (as in Wild Western) in particular come to mind. Most romances play with upper-class settings, and my thought on that is — it's fantasy. It's more escapist to ponder how the other half lives and loves.

I'll leave you with a warning. I was in a writing class where a fellow student was reading his short story. It was written in the first person, and there's a fight at the end where the protagonist narrator is hit in the head, and there the story ends. "Wait, what happened?" we asked in dawning disbelief. The student smiled. "He died." He was quite pleased with himself.

He died? The narrator died? Without warning or foreshadowing or intimation that this was a ghost writing the story? Um, no. The Lovely Bones and American Beauty can get away with breaking one convention because they take the time to set up a believable reason for it. Don't break rules simply for the sake of being different. It's much better to be different with a purpose that helps your story!

When have you broken with convention in your writing or been tempted to? Did it work out the way you wanted? What (published) books have you read that have successfully defied convention?

1.28.2009

How not to respond to readers

This is hilarious:

Dear Author: Top Ten Things Authors Should Not Do at Amazon

It reports on a flame war between an author and her reviewers on Amazon.com.

Note: Do not be this author.
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